FAQs

This is a really tricky question. Usually students have something they want to write about and sometimes that makes parents nervous. I always encourage students (especially those who will have some guidance in revision) to write whatever they feel compelled to write – at least as a draft. If parents are super nervous about this, I encourage the student to write two essays: the one they want to write and the one their parents want them to write. It’s rare that what the parents are nervous about actually shows up on the page because this is the student’s story – not the parents’. The essay the student wants to write is usually the (much) more compelling essay.

Students get a lot of “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” when it comes to essays.

One big advice nugget is: “don’t write about role models or mentors.” This is hard for the student to hear because if someone has changed his life, why wouldn’t he write about that? The reason this guidance is so popular because these types of essays usually end up telling the reader more about the role model than the student. So, students do have to write carefully here. But it can be done well. Here is a great example. It’s strong partly because of the title “Grandma Schmoozing” which is funny and relatable but actually not at all what is going on. This young man loves his grandmother and their outings AND they helped shape him into the person he is. We also see that their relationship is changing and the impact that has and will continue to have on him.

“Don’t write about sports,” is another big advice nugget. I disagree with that. If a child has been involved in a sport for most of her life it would make sense that her essay would center on sports. The important thing is to make sure the essay focuses on the student (and not a bad coach for example) and a moment when the student began to see the world in a new way. This does not have to be a monumental shift in world view. Just a moment when the student said “hmmm” and then moved about in their world differently than before.

One of the examples I use is an essay by a pitcher who had to pitch against his best friend. And his best friend was losing playing time because he hadn’t been performing well. This was a powerful moment for this kid. He had to decide whether to walk his friend or do his best to strike him out. The whole essay only spans about five minutes in real time but there is tremendous energy in the plot of the story. And in the end, we see that the pitcher learned a lot about himself, his friend, and their relationship. There is also a shift – a break in the status quo.

This essay gave the reviewers all the critical elements they needed to engage in the story
• the student’s voice comes through loud and clear
• the is a plot that made the reader curious what would happen next
• there is a shift in the story – the status quo is broken
• something is a stake (not only a friendship but the friend’s potential playing time) which creates tension for the reader
• and a SO WHAT exists – the readers learns why this student shared this story – the time they invested in the essay is valuable

It’s important that the essay have a SO WHAT (usually at the end). Also, what your essay should be is specific. A lot of students say things like, “I learned a lot.” That is generic language that doesn’t help anyone. In the baseball essay example, the so what is” “I learned that we could be friends off the field and competitors on the field. That we both had to do our best even when it was a hard thing to do.”

There are some essays that need to percolate a bit before finding their way in the world. I am most cautious about an essay topic when it might give the admission panel the impression a student is not quite ready for the rigors of college. This may be to due ongoing health issues or lives that are temporarily chaotic. It’s actually very hard to write about something from the eye of the storm. So, especially if the student is currently “in deep” with a particular challenge, I will often recommend waiting a bit to write about it. Perspective often comes more into focus after some time has passed.

The bottom line is the essay should give insights into who students are – insights that are not captured through grades, scores, and lists of activities.